I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Randomize
