Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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