I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
Randomize
