But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
