We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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