i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
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