Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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