Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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