how can u be prego again
Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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