HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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