If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
But break dance skills will only take you so far
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I'm getting married
To pizza
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
