just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Randomize
