i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
where are you?
Hypothermia
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
Can you bring me the toilet please
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Randomize
