Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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