Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Randomize
