question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
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