I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Randomize