so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
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