My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
