Can i not drive my cunt home
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
