It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
Randomize
