Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I'm passing your future prison.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Randomize
