Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
