hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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