if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
