what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize