I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
