rhymes with "ouble enetration"
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Randomize
