I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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