i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Randomize
