just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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