This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
