hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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