At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
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