Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
