So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize
