please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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