meet me or not, i'm out of control
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
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