nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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