Are we in a gay sports bar?
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
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