just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
