Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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