Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Randomize
