And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Randomize