You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
