Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
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