Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
