My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Randomize
