The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
my mouth tastes like poor choices
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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