Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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