im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
